What a coincidence…I was coming back from an appointment yesterday, writing this post, when I saw that Michelle from Bleeding Espresso talked about this, too.
Back in July, I had a little operation done on a part of the body not mentioned on sites that don’t begin with XXX. It wasn’t serious but I didn’t really know that at the time, because it’s not something people often talk about, and it was hard to translate everything to know if the medical term really meant “worry” or just “be uncomfortable.” After the fact, I have discovered a lot of people I know went through the same thing.
I wanted to share my experience because the more you talk about it, the more you know…and of course, my ability to laugh at myself and the situations I get into doesn’t hurt, either.
One of the things I should have put on my “Firsts that count as Rites of Passage in Italy” list is
…a man who is not your boyfriend spends a lot of time between your legs.
I’m used to having a male gynecologist now – I had received some unwelcome test results from my US (female) gynecologist right after I got married in California in 2005, and I had only two days there before I left to go back to Italy. So I knew I would have to “take care of business” in Italy.
I have yet to run into a female gynecologist here in Italy – although at Pavia’s hospital there are several “in residence,” they are relegated to tasks like the Pap smear. Fellow expats…is there a plethora of female gynos where you are? Some female gyno stronghold I don’t know about?
This is not to say male doctors are not sensitive to the patient – there is always a female nurse present during the examination, and from what Michelle mentioned, they have another person present at all times when they’re….down there, even for routine things.
Sometimes other colleagues will stick their heads in from the adjoining room and talk to the doctor while he’s examining you, like yesterday. It doesn’t bother me, but I feel like raising up and saying, “As you can see, we’re open, come on in!”
Flash back to that day in July….(there’s humor here, I promise)
I sat with a dozen or so other ladies waiting for their turn at the day hospital. They called my name – I was one of the first up that morning. The nurse walked ahead of me through a short corridor then ending up…with us in the operating room.
She pointed at a chair – a plain chair, nothing special about it. Brown plastic without armrests. “Get undressed. Pants, socks, underwear. Put these on your feet and this on your head.”
She handed me a sea-foam green cap that I normally associate with all those ER-type shows and I thought, right, we’re in an operating room. In her hand there were also two long forest-green bootie-type things that came up to my knees when I put them on.
Luckily that day I didn’t have a baby tee on or a tank top as it was summer, and I was able to cover a few more millimeters of skin. But what shirt can really cover everything??
Though I was nervous as hell, I started laughing. All my hair is tucked up in this cap, I have a short-sleeved shirt on, I have these new-age booties on (and not even color-coordinated with the cap) and I have both fannies hanging out.
How can I maintain a sense of dignity?
I have used my “Cracker Jack” drawing skills to give you a better visual of what I looked like that morning. Anyone who knows me knows that sometimes I blush easily, leading to a flaming red face. Please, PLEASE laugh….it was a moment that I hope not to repeat but I may not be able to avoid. :)
But I got over the unease quite quickly. There’s not really any room for modesty when you’re talking about health.
I launched myself into the stirrups “giddy up!” and an angry woman came in, which I learned was to be my anesthetist. I was nervous this woman was going to be putting a large needle anywhere near me, but it went as well as it can go when talking about needles and nether regions. The operation didn’t take long, and there are a few sensations and memories I will keep to myself about it.
Fortunately, I have never experienced the uncleanliness that they mention in these recent expose’ about hospitals in Italy. Pavia has one of the best hospitals in the country, and I’m fortunate to be able to go there for this kind of stuff. Of course, the waiting rooms are nothing special (no magazines in the hospital for us) and are really just chairs lined up in the corridor outside the rooms, and are not reminiscent of the sterile-plasticized-helpful-parenting-posters-everywhere like back home. But, the operating room was spotless clean and all the instruments/machines looked new, and that’s what mattered to me. The examination rooms are also clean.
I went with a British friend to a gyno appointment in Rome in 2004 and there I felt the facilities were really grim – bad lighting, fold-up chairs that made up the waiting room, and a sense of dirt everywhere, though the doctor and nurse were friendly and professional. She asked me to come inside so I could help translate but I knew in her place I wouldn’t have wanted to be alone, either. I also went to the “emergency” services a few times but those rooms are really just examination rooms and are not like staying in the hospital. I expected a bit of chaos because, well, it’s an emergency.
I wish someone I knew had talked to me about having gone through this – more about the procedure I had done: LEEP – cervical biopsy – Colposcopy – Cervical Dysplasia
Luckily, there have been some advancements in the area of Cervical Cancer and its precursors just this year which may make this operation (and its cause) unnecessary in the future!
git up on that table girl! AH. i went to a female gyn a year and a half ago (i know, i need to go again) who was highly recommended by my boyfriend’s sister. i had to strip and walk across the room with nothing on but a summer baby tee, with her in the room. getting on the table, there was no blamket to cover me. she immediately shoved a sonogram tube “down there” and started to root around. she entertained no questions and was in a hurry. such a hurry that there was no breast exam. when she did talk to me, she scolded me for not having taken a break from the pill for almost two years…no american doc of mine has ever said that it was necessary. i didn’t take a break, which is one of the reasons that i don’t want to go back. anyway, after waiting 2 hours, she was with me for 10 minutes. this unpleasant experience however is completely overshadowed by my gastroscope ordeal in the dirtiest hospital i’ve ever seen… but i think we’ve already talked about that!
anyway, thanks for sharing. i hope that you have no more problems! and just imagine the horror of having a baby here! good god, if the gyno is this bad, i can’t imagine giving birth.
Italians may be very modest (I have extremely modest friends at least, although I am not one of “you”), but in the very moment when bodies enter the medical realm we tend to lose all modesty. Actually, we tend to get a bit too explicit. (Have you ever known of the old Italian habit of showing off the still partially gory and scabbed over operation cuts? That’s one thing I am modest about!!!) To an Italian it’s totally normal to walk partially naked in front of a doctor, to be visited by a male gynecologist with nobody else in the room or not to have blankets or anything to cover yourself with. The point is that even the more (more than I, I mean) modest of us tend not to think of the doctor, whomever he is, as a person. He’s (or she’s) a sort of technician taking care of a machine. A gynecologist does not see your undersides as sexual (and highly attractive ones) body parts. The gyno sees them as his field of work. If anything, I have personally experienced more gentleness of touch from male gynecologists than from female gynecologists. Let’s say that often the females are just a bit too at ease with the female sexual organs. Males may be rofessionaly at ease ith them, but they are often also fascinated by them as well as respectful of their power (which in turn in both flattering and useful when you have to be inserted medical equipment…). Basically the two fields of medicine where I usually fel more at ease with a male doctor are gynecology and psycology (the two most intimate fields to most). In any other regard, I tend to slightly prefer a female doctor.
By the way, statistically over the 50% of gynecologists are females, you just hit the other 50% or so.
Sara, so sorry you had to deal with this but glad it’s taken care of! When I moved to Italy I asked my great medico di base (a woman) to recommend a female gyno, and she told me that in good conscience there were no female docs she could recommend – said that in all of her experience male gynos were far more gentle – interesting – exactly what Typesetter says….I now have a great (male) gyno who I trust and am completely comfortable with him.
Hi Sara,
I’ve had the same thing done (I think I told you that), though in the comfort of my U.S. gyno’s state-of-the-art office. I do have a female gyno here and I like her but she does make me shimmy across the room naked with no blanket or dressing gown offered. Pazienza!
Michelle
It sounds pretty much like we have here in Holland! You go into a waiting room (with magazines ;) and then you get called into the gynae’s rooms by the nurse. They ask you to take off all your lower clothing and shoes and leave you in your shirt. Then you get to talk to the dr about what’s wrong etc, while wandering around half naked. Then it’s the special chair (like a dentist’s chair with stirrups) which can be raised to the dr’s eye height! He sits on a little stool under your bottom. Very peculiar, but I can see that it would be better than the standard bed setup in a UK hospital.
Tracie, it sounds like your comments echo Laurie and Silvia about female gynos…like I said, I’m used to the male part now and having someone in the room is always good so I don’t even know if I’ll look for a female one.
Silvia I know Italians are not modest about their bodies (re: some of my gym tales in the locker rooms) and that’s probably better for them…but 29 years of training is hard to reverse so quickly. :)
Michelle, you were one of the many that mentioned this to me (after the fact) – I wish I had talked about it before…it would have been much more reassuring. Hopefully this post will help 1-2 people. Plus, the laughter helps everyone. hehe.
Laurie, it’s strange what we get used, no?
Ash – they make you disrobe for the consultation part? At least I got to keep my pants on for that. :)
My first gyno was a female. She was the worst ever. She was mad when I woke her up at 7am on a Saturday because I had vaginal bleeding (I was pregnant at the time) After my miscarriage she told me “Oh well. you’ll have another.”
My second gyno was male and was so much better!
Well, its not like Italians are not modest as a general rule. I have a number of friends who would not be seen naked except by their mother, their partner, and their doctor. personally, I have a hard time understanding this level of modesty (which does not mean that I flash around, obviously, just that I dress for hygiene and warmth rather than modesty).
Just wanted to say – I LOVE your drawing! heheh it is so cute.
The rest of it sounds pretty awful. I know we Americans are prolly weird about our bodies but it just seems so much more practical to at least have a blanket.
Personally, I like women doctors. and not because I think a male doctor is having sexual thoughts. I mean I worked in a ob/gyn office and believe me, after seeing some things I saw – well, lets just say I wouldnt be surprised if some of the “romance” goes away.LOL Makes me mad when any doctor has an abrupt mannerism. I know you do this all day but it is my body. you can be quick but gentle thank you very much!
Sara…the more I get to know you the more I realize we have in common. That blushing thing… the first time I went to an ob/gyn here it was my fiance
I have a similar story. I think we could write about these sorts of things. The worst part for me was that Danilo had to go with me because I was afraid that my Italian wasn’t good enough and I wanted to understand EVERYTHING!
Needless to say, Danilo knows me better than he ever has before! At least there was curtain for me hide behind, not that I had any dignity left!
Cyn
Wow, I love the way you describe this, though I understand it must have been awkward. And I hope you are ok and everything turned out to be well.
Thanks for sharing your excellent story.
While reading it, I could feel my knees slamming shut like the spring-loaded mechanism on a mouse trap!
I have hard enough time with the American gyn’s, male or female. Ugh…
If I could make them perform a pelvic exam in Braille with only the light from one small candle, I would.
I’m sure it was mortifying for you at the time. I imagined the women reading your post at once, shaking there heads in sympathy and smiling broadly.
I find your statement “I have yet to run into a female gynecologist here in Italy – although at Pavia’s hospital there are several “in residence,” they are relegated to tasks like the Pap smear. Fellow expats…is there a plethora of female gynos where you are? Some female gyno stronghold I don’t know about?” a little strange as the top gynecologist in Italy is a woman !! (Daniela Granata)
@Terry, since that post, I can say I’ve had one female gynecologist (so it’s like 7 male, 1 female) – hopefully things will even out more in the future, but in any case I don’t care anymore – I just want good care.